Monday, November 28, 2005
Having spend my last few weekends with children, I came to a revelation. As older people, we play a huge part in the life of a child, whether or not the child is your own. My ability to teach children and interact with them have raised many questions to whether or not I am ready or would ever be ready to be a parent. Ok so it seems very strange for me to be talking about parenthood at 19. But its something that came up in my sea of thoughts.
When I look at the young people now a days, it seems like they are always following someone or something. Like the rockers trend, the harry potter and the beyblade craze. Ok so those are just harmless trends and crazes but what if there was more? What if a child looks up to us and we unknowingly show them things they should not be knowing. As "grown ups", our lifestyle is very liberal. Some are into Sex, Drugs and Alcohol. Some are into gambling, prostitution. Ok so those are the extremes. We would never put a child in a room and allow him/her to watch porno right? But what if our actions shows the kid its ok to see porn, what if our actions tell the kid its right to smoke. And because the child respects us they follow.
It terrifies me. It really does, the kind of influence I may have over a young mind. It makes me sad and scared that I maybe the one to influence the child to be the next Micheal Faye, Anthony Ler or Sunny Ang. It scares me shitless.
I dont know if I should ever be allowed to be a parent taking into consideration my bad moral values, low self esteem and hard headed nature. Ok Lets not say parenthood, the thought of mentoring a child/youth is enough to make me cry. I will never be ready for that. The burden is too heavy for me to carry.
Posted by jasmine at 1:56 PM