Saturday, October 16, 2004
span style="color:#66cccc;">it 530 am in the morning and i really can't sleep. My stomach is feeling funny and my body is not in a very good condition. my last proper meal more than 24 hrs ago. i just took a steroid jab for my hand and i think steroid has strange effects. my hand is super swollen now and well.. i don't wanna eat... i hope this jab works cos if it doesn't i have to go for an op..:( i'm suppose to be resting my hand now but i really can't do wihtout my comp....
baby i wonder wat you are doing now? mostly likly sleeping.. haha... i really miss u.. really idotic thing to say at 530am in the morning... i really wish you were beside me now... i want to be the perfect girl for u.. really... but seriously, i am scared... i am very scared of the future and what it may bring... i am sure apprehensive abt what is going to happen and how we will take it... i have many fears.. how would we get along together when i am sure our personailties will clash alot... both of us are like the most stubborn ppl ard... i have many doubts ... too many that it scares me... i really love u darling.. but.... i dont know.. i really dont know.. too many doubts and too afarid to trust anymore....maybe after we talk today i will feel better... i really hope i would....
i pray that god will really guide us through this and let us learn.. what ever happens in future its god's will...
i am surprise that i am able to get into this relationship cos of all the fears i have... i am one person who always test the water first or plan super ahead before i get into something... i feel super insecure if i don't know what is happening next... but darling with you... suddenly everything is a new adventure.. haha... baby i really miss u now.. really really do.. can't wait to c u in the morning.....
Posted by jasmine at 5:41 AM