Sunday, October 24, 2004
I am sure you have experience waking one morning and realising that your life is never the same again. Suddenly everything you work for, everything u belive in, everything that matters to you doesn't matter any more. You just sit in bed and think to yourself how are you going to face the future, how r you going to move on. That is how I feel now.
I would say that my life is not the same anymore. Everything has changed. Even to the littlest detail... everything is changed. This isnt just abt the relationship that I just got into but more like how my life is falling into place. Its really scary.. Suddenly one morning I woke up and realise that everything has fallen into place. I got everything now, a stable family who loves me alot, good grades, wonderful friends and a boyfriend who is like so marriage material... Suddenly, my 18 yr old outlook to life have to change... No more not bothering about tomorrow or no more no planning... Suddenly respondsibilities change, outlooks change. But some how I have not found the joy that i had many years ago. I am still very tired, so emotinally drained. Everything about my life that people view as perfect is a burden to me. I feel so tired.. So very tired. I dont know why.. maybe i'm having a mood swing, or maybe my time of the month is coming.. but i just feel so sad. I am not the happy girl I was. Last time when I would tell myself how happy I am with life and mean it.. Now when I ask myself if I am happy with life I would just feel like crying... Don't ask me y ... I really dont know... I am super tired... God help me...
Posted by jasmine at 8:54 PM