Sunday, September 19, 2004
Yesterday Jeremy flew off. There was alot of emotions running at that time. His mother looked super upset but after a while she was ok. For me, I felt that I was seeing Natasha walking through the entrence of the departure hall. Suddenly, I couldn't hide my emotions anymore. I just broke. Not literally crying non stop but more like I became super slient. I stood there and stared into space. I know I would miss him but what was on my mind now was how would i react when Natasha leaves. For Jeremy, I know him for one and a half years. But for Nat, I know her for at least 10 years of my life. If for Jeremy's departure I react in such away, can you imagine what would happen if Nat goes. Its no doubt I would miss Jeremy, but for Nat, although she is still here, I already miss her.
Last night as I sat in the comfort of my room and did my quiet time, I read something that really made me feel super at peace with Jeremy's departure to England.
" You may be focusing too much on the rule and not enough on the one giving the rule"
Indeed, I was focusing too much on Jeremy's departure and not on his reason for going. If I was looking at the reason for leaving, I would be happy for him. He is going to study and would be back in 3 years time with his law degree. When I suddenly thought of that, I felt so at peace and happy. I really want to Thank God giving me this insight. Right now my prayer is that God will help me find peace in the fact that I may never see Nat again. I really hope I can find comfort in the fact that she will be going to Canada and she would have a bigger house and well, a not so autocratic goverment......
Posted by jasmine at 2:12 PM